Parent official for league game

TheJet · Post by **TheJet** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 9:08 am

Squirt game last night, team parent on our side says to me you think the ref has a kid on the team or something? Unreal, come to find out after the game, refs kid was the goalie on the opposing team. 1 - would think this would not be allowed by the district 2 - if your the dad/ref don't you find a way to turn that game down? Are there any codes of ethics out there either written or unwritten?

old goalie85 · Post by **old goalie85** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 9:19 am

Jet- Was that your district? or d2 ? I assume yours this time of the year. Should be no way the guy should be working his kids game. Did you guys win?

nofinish · Post by **nofinish** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 9:22 am

Good for the ref: watch your kid and get paid doing it.

TheJet · Post by **TheJet** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 9:22 am

old goalie85 wrote:Jet- Was that your district? or d2 ? I assume yours this time of the year. Should be no way the guy should be working his kids game. Did you guys win?

District 8. Tied 1-1. 45 minute game. Zero penalties. Took a goal from us even some opposing team parents said was in (which was in).

old goalie85 · Post by **old goalie85** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 9:54 am

What a joke. Did the coach call your d8 rep?

TheJet · Post by **TheJet** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 10:03 am

old goalie85 wrote:What a joke. Did the coach call your d8 rep?

Not sure. Our coach is a super nice guy that may not stir it up and it's only a league game so not like we lost a tournament game over it or anything, but just really got my goat last night. My wife was even near other teams bench and noticed several times ref stopping over there to chit chat a bit real quick. 2nd ref was a high school player for same association. I guess that's just how they role. Maybe there is an underlying reason like the original district refs didn't show or something (doubt it). Just had to vent.

The Next One · Post by **The Next One** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 10:40 am

Didn't you say squirt game. Come on guys it is squirts, and maybe no one else was available to ref.

old goalie85 · Post by **old goalie85** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 10:50 am

All trhe other refs were at the Valley-Eagan game????

BadgerBob82 · Post by **BadgerBob82** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 11:32 am

The Next One: Really it was ONLY a Squirt game. So who should care that a ref had a goalie on the team? And who cares that he appears to have called off a goalie his son didn't stop? Who cares! It's not like it was a Pee-Wee game or something really important. Right?

BadgerBob82 · Post by **BadgerBob82** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 11:33 am

Of course isn't Paul Moen still the ref cordinator for D8? Go figure!

TheJet · Post by **TheJet** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 11:42 am

The Next One wrote:Didn't you say squirt game. Come on guys it is squirts, and maybe no one else was available to ref.

Extenuating circumstances fine but I'm just guessing not. So under your philosophy would it be ok for a dad to umpire lets say a 10AAA baseball game his son is pitching? If the score is being kept, no matter what level of play, it is dead wrong for several reasons.

thespellchecker · Post by **thespellchecker** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 11:48 am

TheJet wrote:
old goalie85 wrote:What a joke. Did the coach call your d8 rep?
Not sure. Our coach is a super nice guy that may not stir it up and it's only a league game so not like we lost a tournament game over it or anything, but just really got my goat last night. My wife was even near other teams bench and noticed several times ref stopping over there to chit chat a bit real quick. 2nd ref was a high school player for same association. I guess that's just how they role. Maybe there is an underlying reason like the original district refs didn't show or something (doubt it). Just had to vent.

It couldn't have been a Lakeville North, South, Apple Valley or Eagan h.s. player. They were all still playing. Eastview has been out for awhile, so maybe it was them. When the referee is the father of a goalie on the ice, the other goalie just needs to play that much better.

TheJet · Post by **TheJet** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 12:11 pm

thespellchecker wrote:
TheJet wrote:
old goalie85 wrote:What a joke. Did the coach call your d8 rep?
Not sure. Our coach is a super nice guy that may not stir it up and it's only a league game so not like we lost a tournament game over it or anything, but just really got my goat last night. My wife was even near other teams bench and noticed several times ref stopping over there to chit chat a bit real quick. 2nd ref was a high school player for same association. I guess that's just how they role. Maybe there is an underlying reason like the original district refs didn't show or something (doubt it). Just had to vent.
It couldn't have been a Lakeville North, South, Apple Valley or Eagan h.s. player. They were all still playing. Eastview has been out for awhile, so maybe it was them. When the referee is the father of a goalie on the ice, the other goalie just needs to play that much better.

Good point. Anyhow - Farmington.

old goalie85 · Post by **old goalie85** » Fri Mar 04, 2011 12:32 pm

I'm sure the E-viewgoalie played just fine. What was he supposed to do go score after they waved off his teams winning goal? [The old goalie HATES goalie blamers] Game was 1 to 1!!!!

woodley · Post by **woodley** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 9:59 am

As both a parent and a ref, I've seen this happen due to extenuating circumstances. . . but if not, no way it should ever happen. If it had to happen, what I've seen done, is that when ref/coach intros are done at the beginning of the game, is for the ref to identify the relationship to both coaches and let them know the reason why. Again, it is a squirt game (level?) and in March there may not have been anyone to accept the game. After 40 games I don't particularly relish getting yelled at by first year coaches and parents over what was a check vs. good body position vs. squirt bumper car skating.

iwearmysunglassesatnight · Sat Mar 05, 2011 10:37 am

[quote="woodley"]. After 40 games I don't particularly relish getting yelled at by first year coaches and parents over what was a check vs. good body position vs. squirt bumper car skating.[/quote]

random vent

TheJet · Post by **TheJet** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 10:53 am

woodley wrote:As both a parent and a ref, I've seen this happen due to extenuating circumstances. . . but if not, no way it should ever happen. If it had to happen, what I've seen done, is that when ref/coach intros are done at the beginning of the game, is for the ref to identify the relationship to both coaches and let them know the reason why. Again, it is a squirt game (level?) and in March there may not have been anyone to accept the game. After 40 games I don't particularly relish getting yelled at by first year coaches and parents over what was a check vs. good body position vs. squirt bumper car skating.

He would only have to id himself to one side!! Even so, what is the opposing coach supposed to do if he doesn't think it's right - pull the team - he can't. It would have to have been a last minute emergency for me to be at all justified but my gut says it wasn't. Maybe should have just been rescheduled, if there were extenuating circumstances they were likely known far enough in advance to not allow this to happen. Being a "Squirt" game is a moot point, it's not about a level of play - my error for mentioning that to begin with.

TheJet · Post by **TheJet** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 10:57 am

iwearmysunglassesatnight wrote:
woodley wrote:. After 40 games I don't particularly relish getting yelled at by first year coaches and parents over what was a check vs. good body position vs. squirt bumper car skating.

random vent

I guess so. Do coaches id themselves at the beginning of the game - hey by the way - I am a first year coach?

woodley · Post by **woodley** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 11:42 am

TheJet wrote:
woodley wrote:As both a parent and a ref, I've seen this happen due to extenuating circumstances. . . but if not, no way it should ever happen. If it had to happen, what I've seen done, is that when ref/coach intros are done at the beginning of the game, is for the ref to identify the relationship to both coaches and let them know the reason why. Again, it is a squirt game (level?) and in March there may not have been anyone to accept the game. After 40 games I don't particularly relish getting yelled at by first year coaches and parents over what was a check vs. good body position vs. squirt bumper car skating.
He would only have to id himself to one side!! Even so, what is the opposing coach supposed to do if he doesn't think it's right - pull the team - he can't. It would have to have been a last minute emergency for me to be at all justified but my gut says it wasn't. Maybe should have just been rescheduled, if there were extenuating circumstances they were likely known far enough in advance to not allow this to happen. Being a "Squirt" game is a moot point, it's not about a level of play - my error for mentioning that to begin with.

I don't think the level is a moot point. Refs are paid by the level. My experience has been that often I catch more heat from coaches and fans at lower levels. Sometimes the PW or Bantam games ($40 and $60) make me more likely to accept games late in the season. However, squirts ($25) just don't seem worth it. I recognize that I wouldn't have to ID myself to the home coach, but I make a point to communicate the same info to both benches regardless. As to the opposing teams thoughts of ref assignments, that is also moot. The hosting association (or district ref scheduler) has sole discretion of who they assign.

Again, please understand, I am not in any way justifying a parent reffing unless it was a last resort. I absolutely agree with you that it shouldn't happen.

hockeysqA · Post by **hockeysqA** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 11:46 am

BadgerBob82 wrote:The Next One: Really it was ONLY a Squirt game. So who should care that a ref had a goalie on the team? And who cares that he appears to have called off a goal his son didn't stop? Who cares! It's not like it was a Pee-Wee game or something really important. Right?

He was not the one who called off the goal! It was the younger ref! The goal was NOT in...it hit the cross bar...it's on tape!! This ref is not going to ref one sided, he is very professional and is there to ref fair..no matter what!

woodley · Post by **woodley** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 11:51 am

hockeysqA wrote:
BadgerBob82 wrote:The Next One: Really it was ONLY a Squirt game. So who should care that a ref had a goalie on the team? And who cares that he appears to have called off a goal his son didn't stop? Who cares! It's not like it was a Pee-Wee game or something really important. Right?
He was not the one who called off the goal! It was the younger ref! The goal was NOT in...it hit the cross bar...it's on tape!! This ref is not going to ref one sided, he is very professional and is there to ref fair..no matter what!

Did it hurt when he set the hook???? Badger was being SARCASTIC!!!

hocmom · Post by **hocmom** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 11:53 am

I don't know why anyone would ever ref a squirt game.

It is unfortunate that our young refs have to start reffing squirt games. It might be safer for that new 13 year old ref to just jump right to doing lines at high school game. He will be treated better by the coaches and fans.

hockeysqA · Post by **hockeysqA** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 12:02 pm

TheJet wrote:
old goalie85 wrote:Jet- Was that your district? or d2 ? I assume yours this time of the year. Should be no way the guy should be working his kids game. Did you guys win?
District 8. Tied 1-1. 45 minute game. Zero penalties. Took a goal from us even some opposing team parents said was in (which was in).

REALLY?!!? I doubt the opposing team parents said it was in! It was NOT in..it hit the cross bar..it is on tape! The high school ref is the one who called off the goal..not "the guy working his kids game"!

TheJet · Post by **TheJet** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 12:20 pm

hockeysqA wrote:
TheJet wrote:
old goalie85 wrote:Jet- Was that your district? or d2 ? I assume yours this time of the year. Should be no way the guy should be working his kids game. Did you guys win?
District 8. Tied 1-1. 45 minute game. Zero penalties. Took a goal from us even some opposing team parents said was in (which was in).
REALLY?!!? I doubt the opposing team parents said it was in! It was NOT in..it hit the cross bar..it is on tape! The high school ref is the one who called off the goal..not "the guy working his kids game"![/quote

Yes REALLY?!!? The goal is/was a small part that comes with the territory when something like this is/was allowed to happen - any close play, non call, etc. is going to be brought to the forefront, that's the way it is (but would love to see the angle you have from the opposite end of the ice). Anyhow, don't you think it's ironic a parent of the opposing side would say "I wonder if the ref has a kid on this team"? The sense was there despite your opinion, like it or not. No matter how anyone spins it - high school kid, dad, grandpa, brother, whatever = wrong. It seems almost everyone hear would agree it was wrong unless there were extenuating circumstances. What were the circumstances? Thank you.

TheJet · Post by **TheJet** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 12:24 pm

woodley wrote:
TheJet wrote:
woodley wrote:As both a parent and a ref, I've seen this happen due to extenuating circumstances. . . but if not, no way it should ever happen. If it had to happen, what I've seen done, is that when ref/coach intros are done at the beginning of the game, is for the ref to identify the relationship to both coaches and let them know the reason why. Again, it is a squirt game (level?) and in March there may not have been anyone to accept the game. After 40 games I don't particularly relish getting yelled at by first year coaches and parents over what was a check vs. good body position vs. squirt bumper car skating.
He would only have to id himself to one side!! Even so, what is the opposing coach supposed to do if he doesn't think it's right - pull the team - he can't. It would have to have been a last minute emergency for me to be at all justified but my gut says it wasn't. Maybe should have just been rescheduled, if there were extenuating circumstances they were likely known far enough in advance to not allow this to happen. Being a "Squirt" game is a moot point, it's not about a level of play - my error for mentioning that to begin with.
I don't think the level is a moot point. Refs are paid by the level. My experience has been that often I catch more heat from coaches and fans at lower levels. Sometimes the PW or Bantam games ($40 and $60) make me more likely to accept games late in the season. However, squirts ($25) just don't seem worth it. I recognize that I wouldn't have to ID myself to the home coach, but I make a point to communicate the same info to both benches regardless. As to the opposing teams thoughts of ref assignments, that is also moot. The hosting association (or district ref scheduler) has sole discretion of who they assign.

Again, please understand, I am not in any way justifying a parent reffing unless it was a last resort. I absolutely agree with you that it shouldn't happen.

Thank you for all you do! I for one would never take on your job and have some fear with my older ones getting started.