Edina Tryouts... Here's What's Wrong With Youth Hockey

[regdunlop77]

Many of us know of or have heard of families that move to a community for hockey reasons. When certain "Hockey" expectations are not met it is not surprising to see or hear about their boorish behavior.

After all, these folks put in a tremoundous amount of time, energy, and expense to have their expectations (dreams) realized.

[inthestands]

The reality of this is that it does exist and always will exist. I disagree that attournys have anything to do with it any more than gas attendants do. Reality is that every parent wants the best for their child, want their child to be happy. They want them to experience success, to be popular and to be in the lime light. Right wrong or indifferent,that is the reality. Inject into that the price and expense of hockey you increase the expectation of "Getting something" out of your money. And no in most cases friendship , participation and fun are not enough to satisfy that expectation. The biggest failing imo is that Hockey groups and organizations have failed to create an avenue of relief for this frustration.
A pro player on the outside is looked at as "Should know better" yet They want nothing more than you or I would want for our child. When there is no place to put something you get outbursts and and ruptures of emotion, even from those who should know better. What would a system look like I have no idea. But it is imo what is needed .

I need some clarification on your post..

Are you saying hockey groups and organizations have failed because they don't have talk sessions for parents of kids that don't make the "right" team??

If that is what you are saying, I couldn't disagree more.

This is youth hockey. Take the parents out of the equation, other than getting the kids to the arena, patting them on the back for a job well done, regardless of the team their on, and telling them to listen to the coach, is what the role of each hockey parent should be.

[theref]

Bellows?

Guy is pretty intense as a coach, but I'd hope he has a better head on his shoulders than that. Who knows though.

[carpenterguy]

Edina just finished their tryouts for the Squirt level. An ex-NHLers son did not make the squirt A team and what happens, He and his wife blow up in the lobby of the arena. Yelling, screaming, swearing, going to sue the hockey board.

So here is the question, Can we fix this problem with parents or is it just part of Minnesota hockey?

By the way, I think his son should have made the team, but they took the "Child" of another favored son of Edina.

The parent acting that way is a disgrace, and it will leave a scar on his son for life. Grow UP!!!!!

[BoogeyMan]

In this case. Why doesn't Edina just ask some other association to help evaluate the kids? In return. Edina can help evaluate their kids.

This way you stay away from "Its not what you know it's who you know"

I thought I heard last year that there are some associations that do this. Does anyone know for sure?

Pros / Cons?

[jancze5]

So, we're talking about a 9 year old first year squirt in one of the top youth associations in the state, that didn't get selected for the A team?

This dad is a complete idiot, period! Did I buy his book the other night at the Sota-Michigan game? Then I'm an idiot!

At Woodbury they closed the tryouts and personally I liked the it. Nobody knew jack about who was selected until 24 hours after the last skate, and that was just a jersey #. The players weren't with each other until 3 days later at their first practice. In reality, the first time you really know who was picked, and without seeing the 4 or 5 tryout skates, you have no clue who performed and who didn't. Perhaps this model would serve other associations, such as Edina, in the future.

I hope this young player has a super year on whatever team he did end up on...

[whockeyguy]

i think the better question is what in the h--l are we having tryouts in mid october for squirts, this IS the problem , are they concerned that they wont get their 35 games in, the parents are just by-products of an insane system

[Hockeyguy_27]

The problem in todays world is "attorneys" PERIOD!!! They started this BS and now everyone wants to sue. Spill coffee on yourself "I'm going to sue". It's a gong show. If your kid doesn't make the "underwater basket weaving team" "I'm going to sue the team, the basket weaving board, the AD, the principal, the school board, my neighbor, etc. It's an absolute joke. What happened to the good old common sense life? The answer "$$$$$". And who started this? Answer "attorneys". (Agents). I would go out on a limb and say, if we sent all attorneys over seas to work in a chop stick factory for a year, nobody would miss them. I have personally seen a highschool kid walk by a janitor mopping the floor and spit on the floor, the janitor got on his case and the kid said "There's nothing you can do or I'll sue you". I know I'm getting off the subject, BUT what really irritated me was the parents comment of "We'll sue the hockey board". Like I said before; Every parent should have a brain scan before they can have kids>

Makes you want to be a hockey board member...............high pay, lots of glory

I believe USA hockey has insurance to protect board members personal assets and lawyers that step in if a lawsuit ever went forward. More than likely, the parent will cool down and move forward.

The problem isn't as much the attorneys as it is the liberal system and the more liberal and self serving Bar Association that lobbies for plaintiffs rights no matter how absurd. I'd like to the US adopt the parlimentary policy like they have in England which says if you sue someone and lose, you have TO PAY THEIR LAWYERS BILL TOO!

[Frozen Water]

I'm confused. Isn't Lou Nanne like 65 years old? And I thought Brian Bellows lived in Eden Prairie? Doesn't sound like either one of these guys is the Edina Squirt dad that had a meltdown.

[Undercover Hockey Lover]

There's an easy solution for this problem. With the kind of cash this guy should have if he's an ex-NHLer living in Edina you'd think he'd already have had his kid signed up at Minnesota Made he's guarteened that his son will be a D-1er when he's finished paying.


I know, it's late.....I just couldn't help myself.

[newsguy35]

I'm confused. Isn't Lou Nanne like 65 years old? And I thought Brian Bellows lived in Eden Prairie? Doesn't sound like either one of these guys is the Edina Squirt dad that had a meltdown.

I might be wrong but I heard that last year Bellows was coaching in edina and if I remember right it was about that age group. i could be wrong, someone correct me if I am.

[theref]

I'm confused. Isn't Lou Nanne like 65 years old? And I thought Brian Bellows lived in Eden Prairie? Doesn't sound like either one of these guys is the Edina Squirt dad that had a meltdown.

I might be wrong but I heard that last year Bellows was coaching in edina and if I remember right it was about that age group. i could be wrong, someone correct me if I am.

I'm by no means say it was or wasn't Bellows, but yes I believe he has a son about that age. He has a daughter that plays at about the u-14 age and she wasn't too bad either.

[tourneytickssince59]

Maybe it's because the kid got a mention in Charlie Walters column on Sunday Sept 9 and yet didn't make the team

Kid to watch: Third-grader Kieffer Bellows, son of former North Stars standout Brian Bellows, is a star in Edina hockey leagues.

[dingle]

I do not understand all the parent bashing. If you read the first post it mentioned that the ex-NHLer's son should have made the team, but they picked another favored son. If this kind of politics can happen to an ex-NHLer and his son, it seems that the average (non-coach, non-board member, non-politically correct, non-pro hockey player) parents and their players will have a hard time making the teams that they deserve to make. And if all the tryouts were closed for observation how would anyone really know who had a better tryout.

What should a parents recourse be?, i'm sure everyone can agree that this happens in most associations where "favored sons" make a team ahead of players that actually earned making the top team. I do not agree the the ex-NHLer made the right decision by blowing up at the rink, but he (and others it seems) felt that his son should have been picked ahead of the ones that were picked. I know these are only very young kids, but still, they should be doing these tryouts right the first time.

This topic is related to most of the other posts that are going on right now. ex. stillwater, mn made, how did it get this way.

[boardmember]

No doubt they could field two very competitive teams. And have you seen the coaches they have on their squirts teams? That is some serious experience and knowledge.

Experience and knowledge do not equate into great coaching. Just ask last year's GR Bantam A team. While all that knowledge and experience is a huge plus, many other factors play into coaching kids.

To your point, I know of a couple of former pros that coach youth hockey. One is considered outstanding, while the other is not.

If Waylon posted this, all ex NHL/D1 player coaches and current D1 coaches at the youth level would take offense to this. except: RedHawk Alumn Guy! ':D'

[skillbuilder]

Open door or closed door tryouts doesn't matter. The pressure of tryouts on some kids, imperfect evaluations, politics, injuries or illness etc. will always make tryouts 85% right in a perfect world. All you can hope for is that your own kid is not negatively effected over multiple seasons and if he plays down, that the coaching is good, he has similarly skilled linemates, and his roll on the team is well defined based on his unique skills. Unfortunately, the above rarely happens as the coaching (normally a parent) is often sub standard and is plagued with nepotism, lines are created to bury the less skilled players, and the coach wouldn't know what a "roll" for a player (or a line) was, if he was standing in a donut factory. This is why parents look at it as an all or nothing situation. Do you think that parent would have been that upset if his kid was to play with the second best 15 kids at Edina instead of being on the same line as the # 90 kid who's father was the coach. I doubt it... (another plug for my multi tiered levels)
In reference to a nine year old being done because he didn't make the A team consider this... A prominent peewee A coach was quoted recently as saying "he did not understand how there could have been 6 different players that made the peewee A team that didn't make the squirt A team two years prior". Good luck leap froging kids with that dogma entrenched in the braintrust of your club. Remember, club hockey is a participation based model. It will never be a developmental model for kids below A level without numerous changes in structure and attitudes and it's one of the primary reasons that alternative winter hockey venues will be created and flourish going forward.

[carpenterguy]

I do not understand all the parent bashing. If you read the first post it mentioned that the ex-NHLer's son should have made the team, but they picked another favored son. If this kind of politics can happen to an ex-NHLer and his son, it seems that the average (non-coach, non-board member, non-politically correct, non-pro hockey player) parents and their players will have a hard time making the teams that they deserve to make. And if all the tryouts were closed for observation how would anyone really know who had a better tryout.

What should a parents recourse be?, i'm sure everyone can agree that this happens in most associations where "favored sons" make a team ahead of players that actually earned making the top team. I do not agree the the ex-NHLer made the right decision by blowing up at the rink, but he (and others it seems) felt that his son should have been picked ahead of the ones that were picked. I know these are only very young kids, but still, they should be doing these tryouts right the first time.

This topic is related to most of the other posts that are going on right now. ex. stillwater, mn made, how did it get this way.

You don't understand that the parent acted like a child????

[skillbuilder]

You know, I've often wondered what to do with people like this. I've come to this conclusion - show 'em the door. In other words, if you flip out publicly and make a spectacle of yourself after your child does not make the "right" team, your kid is done. Period.

I know this sounds harsh (especially for the kid who has no control over the parents), but do it once and see how many times it happens again. It will be zero.

Too much political correctness in the world today. We attempt to appease the squeeky wheel. Don't apply grease to the squeeky wheel, constantly trying to fix it - throw it in the freakin' garbage.

As the great Bob Utecht used to write in LPH - "Nuff Said!

Missed this one earlier. Yeah suntzu let's intimidate people into accepting the politics like they do in say China, or North Korea. It sounds as if you are a board member somewhere? If so please resign your post today...
Yes, you hate to witness a public display like this but I understand why it happens. When you were raised with the values of fairness, character and accountability, this aristocratic system will make you nuts.
Signed,
A practicing peasant...

[carpenterguy]

You know, I've often wondered what to do with people like this. I've come to this conclusion - show 'em the door. In other words, if you flip out publicly and make a spectacle of yourself after your child does not make the "right" team, your kid is done. Period.

I know this sounds harsh (especially for the kid who has no control over the parents), but do it once and see how many times it happens again. It will be zero.

Too much political correctness in the world today. We attempt to appease the squeeky wheel. Don't apply grease to the squeeky wheel, constantly trying to fix it - throw it in the freakin' garbage.

As the great Bob Utecht used to write in LPH - "Nuff Said!

Missed this one earlier. Yeah suntzu let's intimidate people into accepting the politics like they do in say China, or North Korea. It sounds as if you are a board member somewhere? If so please resign your post today...
Yes, you hate to witness a public display like this but I understand why it happens. When you were raised with the values of fairness, character and accountability, this aristocratic system will make you nuts.
Signed,
A practicing peasant...

As soon as the parent acts like that, he loses ALL credibility!

[skillbuilder]

And carpenterguy, when connected parents use their power to better their own, they lose their dignity & their soul. Whats worse....

[carpenterguy]

And carpenterguy, when connected parents use their power to better their own, they lose their dignity & their soul. Whats worse....

It's all bad! Parents should just leave the kids alone!!

[Can't Never Tried]

Most parents regardless of there fame or fortune will do anything to lessen the pain to their child of being rejected or harmed....it's human nature.
It's not always the best choice because the child will fare better in the long haul if they learn to deal with rejection at an appropriate age.

Of course we're not wild animals, but we do have some instincts, and one is to protect our offspring from harm (or the threat of harm), regardless of the situation.
Some people go off more easily then others, just the same way some parents are more protective...in the end.....and after the blow of being rejected and the perceived embarrassment subsides, the child starts to play and enjoy the game for what it was meant to be, the parent sees the game for what it is, and enjoys the childs accomplishments...and most of the time it's all forgotten. Time heals.

My 2 ¢

[BoogeyMan]

In this case. Why doesn't Edina just ask some other association to help evaluate the kids? In return. Edina can help evaluate their kids.

This way you stay away from "Its not what you know it's who you know"

I thought I heard last year that there are some associations that do this. Does anyone know for sure?

Pros / Cons?

[Silent But Deadly]

Most parents regardless of there fame or fortune will do anything to lessen the pain to their child of being rejected or harmed....it's human nature.
It's not always the best choice because the child will fare better in the long haul if they learn to deal with rejection at an appropriate age.

Of course we're not wild animals, but we do have some instincts, and one is to protect our offspring from harm (or the threat of harm), regardless of the situation.
Some people go off more easily then others, just the same way some parents are more protective...in the end.....and after the blow of being rejected and the perceived embarrassment subsides, the child starts to play and enjoy the game for what it was meant to be, the parent sees the game for what it is, and enjoys the childs accomplishments...and most of the time it's all forgotten. Time heals.

My 2 ¢

CNT is absolutely right.

I'd like to add that I cannot excuse the parents' behavior. However, having threatened to sue a local association that knowingly allowed a coach to keep a player off a team, who was number 4 during tryouts, I know that "smoke filled room" decisions are being made. Bottom line, upon appeal, several months and $2000 later the local association's grievance committee ruled that there was "sufficient evidence presented" that the coach kept the player off the team and the "grievance was sustained". Equally important is the fact that this was NOT a bubble player! It happens!

[dingle]

carpenterguy,

I understand that the parents acted poorly in this situation.

My point would be that the coaches/evaluators/board members of edina that picked the squirt team acted like children when they picked there 'favorite son' over this other player that seemed to have a better tryout.

When this happens in an association consistenly, it not only effects the player/parent that gets picked over, but other players/parents also notice picks like these. I see this as a reason parents look for programs outside their associations.