Wow Elliott, you really had to dig to find that one.elliott70 wrote:2008 Minnhock All Stars Team
First we take a look at the front office, and support staff of this star studded team.
GM/Coach: elliott70
This old fart has been around the game since the earth cooled enough to form ice, he knows how to deal with the other executives in the league and won’t be brow beatin by anyone, plus we needed a coach that speaks the language like a foreigner with words like teh and taht, plus the patch on the eye scares the crap out of the opponents!
Assistant Coach: Mitch Hawker
This guy does a lot, gets zero credit for it, and well… like most assistants ya hardly know he’s even there!
Asst Coach: EREmipre
This guy has tried harder for longer then anyone to gain the head coaching job, but Moses just keeps hanging on. The future is bright for this guy if he stays away from the wine and the women…or at least the women!
Recruiting: Gopher Blog and The Exiled One
These guys seem to know every player that ever played (mostly from Edina) and promote on a level needed to be the best, as long as they think so !
Public Relations and Player counseling: Breakout
Because of his vast experiences this guy knows the ins and outs of the game, and has the words for any situation.
Trainer: wbmd
This guy fixes more injured posts then any one on the bored, not afraid of inflicting pain in the process.
Equipment Manager: DMom
Fitting that we have her washing the jerseys and stinky stuff, and hey… that’s women’s work!
Statistics: Number Cruncher
This guy is 98.6254981% accurate most of the time, what more do you want!
Facility Manager: Zamman
Nobody cleans cake of the locker room walls like this guy, he’s like the friggin Billy Mays of a hockey rink!
Video Production: iwatchalotofhockey
This AV geek is always trying to get a gig somewhere, even if there isn’t a game, he’s been known to shoot video of Zamman sweeping popcorn after an AHA game!
Team Cook and Announcer: Irishman’s Shanty
This guy keeps the scores going, and keeps the team on that high fat diet, and brings Jamison Whiskey for the coach .
Now to the players this was an extremely hard draft, and I’m sure some moms and dads will be calling, but hey…. this is the big leagues and life isn’t fair so suck it up if you didn’t make the squad.
Starting at Left wing: Govs93
There is no better left winger then this guy, I mean he leans so far left that that he adds weight to the right side of his helmet just to stay balanced.
Staring at Center: Neutron14
Now this guy is clearly in the middle, he makes creative plays that stun the opponent, His downside is he rarely passes on good scoring opportunities and takes the shot himself,
thankfully he usually scores, and never misses an empty net shot!
Starting at Right Wing: packerboy
No one is better on the right then this crafty player, he has an unbelievable spin move when needed, but also has great balance and fair speed.
Gives the team prayers, but has been known to chase the local nuns on road games.
Starting at left Defense: East Hockey
This is one of the enforcers on the squad this guy has taken out more opponents then the whole team combined, and never as much as received a scratch.
Skates backwards like the wind when needed and can really control the “Boreds”
Starting at Right Defense : BIAFP
This guy is the team antagonist, he’ll drop the gloves if ya look at him wrong, rarely gets beat if he can get back in the zone on time, and always blames the goalie if he does.
Also drives the team bus…although it’s a short one! Hates the the goalie!
Starting in goal: Angus Young
This is one bad Arse goalie…. but just what the team needs, he’ll take that cheap shot behind the play even if it’s someone on his own team, plus he brings crackers to all the games so he’s a team favorite. Works with the right D like they were one and the same.
Alternates:
At left wing: Lily Braden
Normally we wouldn’t tolerate a women on the squad but this is not your normal women she’s more likely to hit you with the pipe, then actually hit it!
At Center: tomASS
This guy has to play center because he’s all over the place, and rarly has a true position, he’s also a risk to the squad as he’s been banned from the league on at least one occasion.
At Right Wing: OGEE OGELTHORPE
Obviously this is another enforcer on the team if by name alone, loves flannel!
At Left Defense: TTpuckster
An alternate because he really only plays on the left side, and never goes on the offensive.
At Right Defense: HOFam’r
This guy is offensive by nature, especially when the opposing team isn’t attacking, loves a fight, but ends up on the defensive side, quits easily and gives up on odd man attacks!
In Goal: O Town Clown
This guy yaps like a goalie, very long winded about Basketball and how it relates to hockey?? Limited playing time, I mean it‘s a friggin orange ball….c’mon!
Well there ya have it your Minnhock All Stars 2008
if you want the rest: http://www.ushsho.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=17569
Since several of the players have moved on to the Kalamazoo farm team, who will step up and put together a new team for our Coach and GM Elliott?
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